Last week, on a whim, I decided that now was the right time to start potty training. Not two weekends from now, which we had planned. Sensibly, since our weekends are booked until then. Oh no, I decided that we had to do it now. NOW.
I have no idea why.
While things were going very well in the beginning, so well in fact that I was worried about the kiddo’s teeth rotting out of his head because of all of the candy he’s “earning”. But we did have one, ummm, blooper. It’s just too funny not to share.
Flashback to last week Thursday, day one of the official start of potty training. It’s the end of the day, we’re winding down (which means the kiddo is racing from room to room in the house). Dad-oo and I are cleaning up from a late dinner.
The kiddo buzzes in from his bedroom and proclaims “I POOPED!” Which isn’t usually a cause for alarm.
Except this time he was neked from the waste down.
I’ll spare you the gory details, but in the events that followed one of the dogs managed to make off with a nice little turd. And he proceeded to eat it. TO EAT IT!
I know, I threw up in my mouth a little bit too.
Now, since I’m obviously an expert on potty training (bwahahahhahahahhah), here’s what I’ve learned so far.
- Bribe, bribe and super bribe. Every time the kiddo goes pee on the potty he gets a jelly bean. Every time he goes poop, he gets chocolate.
- I’m not to proud to beg. If you hear a crazy woman in the stall next to you begging her son to pee so she can give him candy, you can bet that it’s me.
- There’s no shame in super-liquefying. The more the kiddo has to pee, to more chances for success. Or…
- Expect that there will be accidents. On the floor. The rug. The wall. Just make sure to hide the electronics.
- Accept the fact that there will be a LOT of nudity. Not the fun kind, but at least the dimpled butt running around is cute.
- A potty success chart is a necessity. Or so I’ve been told. I haven’t actually gotten around to making one yet. I mentioned bribing with candy, right?
- As Dad-oo describes it, this has turned into a wiener-self-discovery journey. Yes, the kiddo has learned more about his “favorite parts” than a 2 year should really know.
- It’s fun to pee in stores. Target for instance, where we roughly spend half of our time each week. Who doesn’t love that store?
- The amount of TV time increases exponentially relative to the amount of liquid. But it helps reduce unwanted accidents, so it’s worth a little extra boob-tube time.
- Have you been through the potty trenches? What did you learn?
You can expect more stories as we dig out way through the trenches. Hopefully we will all make it out alive on the other side.
This post is linked up with Oh Amanda’s Top Ten Tuesday.
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{ 17 comments… read them below or add one }
Potty training is such a joy
Paige thinks she’s ready to start… and I feel like we just finished with Fynn (though it’s been quite a while… he still has occasional issues with pooping on the potty… what a freaking process…) so I’m the one not ready to dive in. Ugh!!
.-= Corinne´s last blog ..Ivory =-.
Potty training was a positive nightmare in my house. Oh yes, I had no plan, no approach. I delved in based on pressure from others. Suffice it to say it wasn’t a pretty picture and there were lots of tears from both me and my son. So I have no words of wisdom. I didn’t use a reward chart, but I did use rewards (m&m’s) in our house. We stressed over it so much that I got fed up, gave up and moved on. Not too long after that he just started doing it on his own (seriously, completely out of the blue) and we haven’t looked back since.
.-= Christine LaRocque´s last blog ..Budding buddies and all that is sibling =-.
@Christine LaRocque, I’ve heard from so many people to not stress about it, just let it happens when it happens. That’s my philosophy so far, with some encouragement of course. Jelly beans work wonders. As do pull ups actually.
*sob, sob* I am STILL in the potty trenches with my youngest. I am convinced that she will be attending Prom in a Pull-up.
.-= TheKitchenWitch´s last blog ..Minted Watermelon and Lemon Ice Pops =-.
@TheKitchenWitch, oh no, how old is she?
Ohh nooo. This possibility – the dog eating the poop – never crossed my mind. Dogs can be so naughty!
.-= Eva @ Eva Evolving´s last blog ..Bringing that vacation happiness home =-.
@Eva @ Eva Evolving, It’s disgusting what dogs will eat. Just disgusting.
In the midst of potty training here too and suddenly really glad we don’t have a dog.
We’ve been advocates of bribery as well, but we’ve recently escalated what Big Boy needs to do to earn a treat. After three months, he doesn’t have too many accidents anymore, but now he’s very fond of pooping after we put him down for the night. Charming! So now his prize is for staying poop-free in the night.
Ahh, potty training. One of those adventures one really couldn’t imagine before having kids. Good luck!
.-= Kristen @ Motherese´s last blog ..Life After Yes, Chapters 12-22 =-.
@Kristen @ Motherese, I’m slowly increasing what he needs to do for those jelly beans. Now he as to go potty 2-3 times before he gets one. He still gets chocolate if he poops, but that’s only happened once so far.
My potty training experience with my youngest was exactly like yours, minus the poop-eating dog
We bribed, we drank massive amounts of liquid, and we enjoyed lots of nakedness. It worked though, and pretty quickly too. With my oldest, I was so young and naive, I thought I could just tell him, Now you are a big boy and use the big boy potty. Yeah, that worked. We had a huge “blooper” in the beauty shop, and me being so smart had no diaper bag, no change of clothes, nothing. The memory is physically painful, it was such a bad parenting moment.
Sounds like you are on the right track, good luck!
.-= Sheri´s last blog ..Top Ten Tuesday ~ Kids’ Birthday Parties =-.
@Sheri, I had something like that happen at the library one time. I somehow managed to leave the house without a single diaper anywhere. Needless to say, we ran out of there as quickly as we could.
HAHAHA! EWWW! We used jelly-beans for dookies and a sticker-chart for wee (attempts and successes) so I am definitely pro-bribe. But… I don’t recommend buying the big container of Jelly Bellys from Costco. One for the kiddo… two for me…
.-= Heather´s last blog ..Blueberries Make This Donut a Healthy Choice… Right? =-.
@Heather, That’s exactly what has been happening here. I’m going to gain like 15 pounds before this is over.
Yes I had human feces on the floor this morning…what’s worse is I found more apparently from this morning later this afternoon……
*sigh*
@hippie4ever, I expect that to happen over here in the future as well.
I HATE when my daughter has to use a store bathroom. Not because of any weird public potty phobias, but she’s the Goldilocks of the Restroom. Every. Single. Solitary. Stinkin’ toilet has to be personally tested out, until she finds the one that suits her tush just right.
@SpitFire, Oh my goodness, that has me giggling. I can see how it would be terribly annoying though.
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